And then you bit into them, and learned once again that Cut-me-own-Throat Dibbler could find a use for bits of an animal that the animal didn’t know it had got. Victor eyed the glistening tubes in the tray around Dibbler’s neck. Many worthwhile careers in the street-cleansing, fruit-picking and subway-guitar-playing industries have been founded on a lack of understanding of this simple fact. Of course, it is very important to be sober when you take an exam. He put more effort into avoiding work than most people put into hard labour (MP) Victor has passed through there a long time ago, had gone straight through commonplace idleness and out the far side. Ordinary laziness was merely the absence of effort. … Victor Tugelbend was also the laziest person in the history of the world. You know? They’re the thinner ones with the pale faces? Because we’re a university? They come with the whole thing, like rats-’ (MP)

‘A few twenty-mile runs and the Dean’d be a different man.’ ‘Ah, but Master,’ said the Bursar smiling indulgently, ‘the word ‘fit’, as I understand it, means ‘appropriate to a purpose,’ and I would say the body of the Dean is supremely appropriate to the purpose of sitting around all day and eating big heavy meals.’ (MP) ‘ Fit? The Dean looks like a man who’s swallered a bed!’ ‘I would say they are supremely fit, myself.’ ‘That would be the senior masters, Master,’ said the Bursar. ‘I went into the Uncommon Room this morning, and it was full of chaps snoring!’

Everyone had got so accustomed to him it was hard to remember a time when the Library was not run by a yellow-fanged ape with the strength of three men. There was always this trouble with the Librarian.

In fact he shouted at birds, and what he normally shouted was ‘Winged you, yer bastard!’ (MP)īy and large, the only skill the alchemists of Ankh-Morpork had discovered so far was the ability to turn gold into less gold. …Ridcully the Brown did speak to the birds. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way. There’s a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork, greatest of Discworld cities.Īt least there’s a saying that there’s a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork.Īnd it’s wrong. The Discworld is as unreal as it is possible to be while still being just real enough to exist.

Moving Pictures by Terry Pratchett